Speaker. Writer. Facilitator. Consultant.

Meet Xander

Disabled. Sick. Queer. AuDHD. Abolitionist.

Xander spent their life striving to be seen as perfect 

by pushing through pain.

Eventually their body and mind were in an untenable state of

pain, illness and anxiety.

That collapse led them back to their body, 

their needs, 

and the power of collective care.

Now, they create spaces where honesty, grief, and joy can coexist

Where disabled, neurodivergent and queer people

can be seen in both their struggles 

and their magic.

I teach, speak, and write about

Disability chronic illness and interdependence

Neurodivergence and creativity

Queerness and collective magic

Whiteness, racism, and systems of harm

Putting theory into practice

Power that grows in the cracks

Dreaming the Web Into the World

In May of 2022, I painted the community

I dreamed of.

This image has been a beacon

of what community could feel like;

a web that is so vibrant and robust that it can hold us

when we fall and breathe new life into all of the edges.

Back then, this felt so far off

now when I look around,

I feel this web becoming more and more a part

of my community.

Experience & Training

Over a decade of coaching, grounded in lived experience

My work lives at the intersection of:  

  • nervous system rewiring  

  • trauma-informed support  

  • somatics and body wisdom  

  • spiritual companioning  

  • the power of ritual  

Where it started

My coaching journey began in 2015 with The Conscious Leader through Innovative Connections.  

It cracked something open in me — the way a coaching mindset could shift everything.  


In 2017, I completed CoachRICE at Rice University, an ICF-accredited program.  

I’ve been learning, apprenticing, and refining my practice ever since.

Ongoing Study & Facilitation

I’ve been shaped by incredible teachers and movements:  

  • Holistic Resistance – a racial-justice organization I’ve studied with since 2020, where I now serve as a facilitator 


Certifications:  

Weaving Disability Justice

Many of the frameworks I studied didn’t center disability — so I began shaping one that does.  

Together with others, I’ve built an approach that weaves:  

  • disability justice  

  • interdependence  

  • access intimacy  

  • the lived wisdom of disabled and chronically ill people  

This work bridges coaching, community care, and disability justice,  

challenging ableist ideas about capacity, productivity, and healing.